The Corpse
Goddess
By Kristi
Jones
Genre:Urban
Fantasy
Publisher:
Evernight Publishing
ASIN:B008EZXJ7E
Number of
pages: 274
Word Count:
79,034
Blurb/Book
Description:
Party girl
Meg Highbury wakes up the morning of her twenty-first birthday with one hell of
a hangover – and a walking corpse in her apartment. Meg turns to her straight-laced neighbor
Armando for help and together they discover that Meg is a Valkyrie.
What’s more,
her first duty is to trade places with the corpse. But Meg is being sent to her Death Duty too
soon. In a race against time, Meg frantically tries to find a loophole to her
gruesome fate, but while Meg is determined to live whatever the cost, Armando's
strict moral principles keep getting in the way of her plans for escape.
Can Meg walk
the 'right' and narrow path, possibly sacrificing her mortal life, for love?
And if she can, will Armando have the stomach to love a rotting corpse of a
girl who is falling apart in more ways than one?
EXCERPT
“You don't know her, Armando.” A sticky, slimy substance
filled Meg’s mouth. She swallowed, put a hand to her chest, willing herself not
to throw up. She made her own skin crawl, thinking about what was going on
inside her body. It took a minute, but the taste in her mouth dissipated. She
went on. “She's the only person who could have sent the book. There isn't
anyone else in my life, don't you get that? She wanted me to read it and call
up this, this, thing. And I hate her for it.”
And the dam broke. She couldn’t fight the tears. Her
shoulders heaved, and she sank back down onto the bed, surrendering to the
tears and the anguish and the pain. She sobbed in great wracking jerks and
heaves. A small inner voice muttered, “get it under control, girl, you're
making a fool of yourself”, but the emotions were too strong.
Armando sat beside her, his hand on her back. Meg focused on
the weight of his hand, the warmth and the life of it. She closed her eyes and
focused all her senses on that hand. She pictured it in her mind. She wondered
if he tasted like salt. She held onto the image of Armando's hand, flushed with
blood and warm in the sun, until all thoughts of rot and death receded.
“It’s okay, Meg. It’ll be okay,” Armando said. He removed
his hand, but remained seated beside her.
“It isn’t fair, you know,” Meg said, keeping her eyes
closed. “I haven’t done anything. I’ve wasted so much time, partying and stuff.
Funny thing is, I used to look at you and think you were wasting your life.”
“Yeah, I kinda knew that.”
“I should have been studying and learning. Maybe if I’d been
studying, been focused on school, I never would have gone to the cemetery.”
“I don’t know about that. It was your twenty-first birthday.
I didn’t spend my twenty-first birthday studying.”
It was Meg’s turn to arch an eyebrow. “You didn’t?”
“Of course not.
Contrary to what you might think, Meg, I do have a social life. It just
doesn’t involve drugs and gallons of alcohol.”
Meg bristled at this, but decided to let it pass. He was
right, she supposed, but it didn’t make it any less embarrassing.
“Anyway, curiosity isn’t something you can cure with
schoolwork.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, it isn’t necessarily a bad thing that you like to
push the envelope.”
“Maybe,” Meg said. She wasn’t sure what Armando was trying
to say, but she knew he was trying to make her feel better about calling up her
own death buddy.
“Besides, you’ve had lots of experiences. I’m pretty sure
you’ve done tons of things I haven’t done.”
“That’s the kicker, Armando,” Meg said, turning to face him.
“I haven’t. I haven’t done anything but drink and laugh at stupid jokes. I’ve
gotten drunk and high and puked in my kitchen sink, but that’s not exactly a
bucket list. I’ve never loved anybody. I’ve never gone sky diving or driven a
race car. Christ, the worst part is, I’m not even good at being a party girl. I
haven’t jumped off the Brooklyn Bridge or gone bungee jumping.”
“We don’t live
anywhere near the Brooklyn Bridge.”
“That’s not the point. I’m just saying I haven’t lived yet.”
Meg pointed at the corpse in the room. “I’m about to turn into moldy cheese,
and I haven’t lived yet. A Valkyrie, whatever the fuck that is, is supposed to
get one lifetime right? Well, doesn’t a lifetime include certain things?
Marriage, kids, adventures.”
“You want kids?”
“I don't know. Probably not. But I'd like the chance to
decide.”
“Right. Makes sense.”
He was looking uncomfortable with Meg’s talk of kids and
marriage. Armando, who appeared completely at ease with bodily fluids, farts
and personal belief systems, was acting like the typical commitment-phobe.
“Don’t worry, Armando. I’m not asking you to marry me or
have kids with me. I’m just saying, I think I deserve all that, you know?”
Armando nodded, but his eyes were unfocused. He was thinking
of something else.
Meg shifted away. Her stomach was roiling again, and she was
afraid she might fart. The stench of Cousin Ed clearly still bothered him, and
suddenly she didn’t want to disgust Armando. She realized with a sort of
dawning wonder that she wanted him to like her.
She could feel the heat of his leg against hers, but she
kept her eyes on the floor. Her shoes were off, and she noticed that her
toenails were turning blue. Fighting off another eruption of the despicable
tears, she thought about asking him to get her a drink or something – anything
to lessen the tension between them – when the bedroom door clicked open. Meg
and Armando broke apart like startled lovers.
________________
________________
The Corpse Goddess Music Play List
Changes by David Bowie
All This and Heaven Too by Florence and the Machine
Monsters by Matchbook Romance
When We Were Young by The Killers
Sweet Child of Mine by Guns N Roses
99 Problems by Hugo
Demons by Imagine Dragons
Ain't No Grave by Johnny Cash
Dead! by My Chemical Romance
Carry Me Down by Demon Hunter
Gravedigger by Willie Nelson
Ride of the Valkyries by Richard Wagner
Everybody's Changing by Keane
___________________________
Author Bio:
Kristi Jones
spent her childhood exploring European castles, crumbling manor houses and
ornate cathedrals, always looking for secret passages and hidden rooms. She holds a degree in European history and
loves to throw ‘ordinary’ characters into extraordinary circumstances.
She
currently lives in south Texas with her husband and two children, who inspire
her daily. She is a member of the
Writers’ League of Texas and Romance Writers of America. She loves old movies, being a Mom, the feel
of paper in her hands and things that go bump in the night.
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Thank you so much for dropping by!!
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