Saturday, August 06, 2011

Motherhood (and Writing) Ain’t For Wimps

     I knew it going in. But back then, my biological clock and the fantasy of frolicking with my children in fields of wildflowers shadowed all the doubts. I think it was when I gave birth to daughter #1 when it really hit me. It was a great pregnancy with little morning sickness. Thought I had it made. My husband and I took Bradley method classes to have an all-natural birth.

     Now, I won’t lie to you. Natural childbirth is a wonderful thing, and I did it twice more after that (nope, didn’t learn my lesson after #1), but it HURTS! Childbirth, however, is only the beginning. I’ve seen so many women stress about that. That’s nothing compared to what comes afterward. An entire human being is now your responsibility. For the first year of our little daughter’s life, I worried myself sick over every little thing, sure that something I did or didn’t do would lead to her demise. You’ll be happy to know that she survived (and I did too, minus a few hairs).

     I had two more children (another daughter and son) after our first little guinea pig, and I’ve kept them all alive so far. They do have days when they try their best to kill each other, but have yet to succeed.

     I’ll admit that in these days of raising young children full time and trying to forge a writing career, life gets pretty crazy. There are days when I’m so frustrated I want to cry. My fuse gets entirely too short. And I wonder if I’ll ever find a good balance between being mom and writer.

     Nope, motherhood ain’t for wimps. Neither is writing. Both endeavors require sacrifice in both time and heart. When a writer applies words to a page, they apply a little piece of themselves for the world to see. It makes us vulnerable. When our words are judged, we feel judged ourselves. The only way we can succeed is to be persistent. We grow with each and every project, just as moms perfect their skills with each and every child.

     Our first child was (and still is, really) our guinea pig. At nine years old now, we are getting into the ‘tween years. I learn something new with her every day, but with child #2 and #3, I’ve got a better handle on what to expect. The same thing is happening the more I write and put things out there. I’m learning what to expect, what works and what doesn’t. The obstacles are still frustrating at times, but every one of them teaches me a lesson.

     Is all the stress and work involved in motherhood worth it? Absolutely. How about the ups and downs of writing? Definitely. In fact, I might not have even attempted writing for publication if I hadn’t been a mother. I’ve made it through mommy boot camp into full-time mom of three status. And if I can survive this, I figure I can survive the process of writing a novel (or two, or three, or ten).

      Now, stop whining about that draft of yours and go finish it. Or you can babysit my three wild ones. Yeah, I thought so!

Mysti Parker is a full-time wife, mom of three, and a writer. Born and raised in Kentucky, writing has always been her first love. After many years of pursuing other things, she began her writing career in earnest in 2009. Look for more romantic tales from her fantasy world of Tallenmere, where magic, passion, murder, and mayhem are a part of everyday life.

A Ranger's Tale  by Mysti Parker

Paperback, E-book, or Kindle, 186 pages
Published January 29th 2011 by Melange Books
ISBN 9781612351

 "Elves, wizards, and hot romance!" ~Lyn Horner, authorof Darlin' Druid

“…I was completely surprised by how involved I became in the story. The fantastical world created by the author became very real to me and as a reader that is a very good thing.” ~ Wendy Mitchell, You Gotta Read Reviews
Mysti Parker has hit one out of the ballpark …I thoroughly enjoyed visiting this world and this story which I read in a single sitting - I couldn't put it down.” ~ WildAboutBones, GoodreadsReviewer

Once upon a time an elven noble woman longed to leave her gilded cage. A half-breed former pirate wanted nothing more than to escape his guilty past. Easier said than done...
     In the fantasy world of Tallenmere, the high elf, CaliphanyAranea, nearly a century old, has never been allowed to travel farther than a few miles out of the capital city of Leogard. Her father, Sirius, leads the Mage Academy, and after losing his only son, he expects Caliphany to take his place one day. The trouble is, she doesn't want to study magic and doubts she'll ever be as good a wizard as her father. She dreams of leaving Leogard to explore the world and strike out on her own--lofty goals for Sirius' daughter, who also happens to be King Leopold's niece. 

            When two brutes at Leogard Harbor attempt to kidnap her while she dreams of faraway lands, half-elf ship captain and ranger, GaladinTrudeaux, comes to her rescue. From their first chance encounter, to the finale, where Caliphany must decide where her heart truly lies, she and Galadin will face more adventure, more love, more heartache, than they ever thought possible. Through it all, they discover the power of forgiveness and of a love that stands the test of time.

A Ranger's Tale available now at: Melange BooksAmazon.comBarnes & Noble, and many other online stores!

Visit me at GoodreadsFacebook, or  Twitter (@MystiParker)


Mysti said...

Thanks for having me here, Mila!


Mila Ramos said...

Thank you hon for coming!!

Though I do have to do you write with three kids in the house? Is that a master zen thing?? *bows to you*

Tori said...

I loved reading your post, Mysti. We share some common ground -- I have two children, ages five and ten, both delivered naturally, and I am beginning / returning to my journey as a writer while also parenting. It's a bit easier now that they are older, but the ease of writing depends entirely on their ability to entertain themselves, or the distraction provided by my husband. I find it helps to take myself to a private place, like the backyard, but inevitably the five year old follows me. Our little house has few other places to hide. No lock on our bedroom door (Murphy's Law intervened one day: my husband accidentally locked the dog inside and had to break the mechanism to free her), a small living/dining room, the kids' bedrooms, small kitchen. My dream is to have an office space or den one day. I'll probably get it after they've left home for college!